acollegestudent

OK… OKOKOKOK…..

Hi guys. This is Alberto.

I wish i was Asian. AZn people are hella cool. I’m just plain white and i steal puppies.

Sometimes in the morning I wake up and I just go straight to class. Theres no need to wash my face or change or even look in the mirror. I look like this all the time in fact. It’s the cool werewolf look I’m going for. You know that awesome movie Twilight? I want to be the werewolf like Jacob Black. He was my inspiration.

I also think that i need cialis. You can look it up if you are curious enough. I just watched a commercial about it just now. It looks good, I think I’ll talk to my doctor about getting some.

I want a husky. they are so cute. I like furry animals. they are soft. i could rub my face all over their fur. i want to name my dog killa. i think it is a funny name. i also like spagetti. my favorite day in the DC is when they have spaghetti and meatballs. also, mashed potates and chicken pot pie. they are so delicious. it makes me drool thinking about food. i think i will eat soon.

my roommate armando is a funny fella. he is sleeping. i think i should pull a prank on him. maybe i will fart on his pillow. then he will have red eye, like from that pregnant movie.

342364593

I hate being so melodramatic about my love life. I wish it would just figure itself so i wouldn’t have to worry about it all the time. But I guess that’s why i’m a hopeless romantic.

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560852192

most of my “a funny thing happened to me today” stories are total lies. although the ease with which i concoct them sometimes alarms me, i think it’s mostly a harmless little dumb habit that doesn’t get me into any trouble…

but…

… i think one of those stories, warped in the rumor mill, may have gotten one of my high-school teachers fired.

she was kind of a bitch.

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403176438

16/f

Last night I had a dream in which I was kissing this girl I know. The kissing was all rushed and desperate, and made me really hot. In real life, I don’t talk to the girl very much at all. But when I saw her today, all I could think about was kissing her.

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213960853

I really wish my best friend were more interested in me. He’d be a great boyfriend, but he’s just too good a friend to be like that.

He’s on the phone with another friend of ours. I look at him and wish soooooo much he’d kiss me.

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590441966

I don’t like how almost all the confessions on here have to do with hate or sex.
So…
My confession?
I really think paperclips are the cutest objects on Earth.

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694623160

A lot of chicks only like buff, built guys, but I find a lot of fat guys really cute, because fat guys are often strong as well. They’re like tough teddy bears. And a lot are really nice. Most buff guys are jerks.

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637608500

I’m the “nice-guy”

which means I won’t get ass ‘til I’m like 30 and married

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761505899

I pretended I had stomach problems to avoid having sex with my wife because I had jacked off 6 hours earlier…

I have done this more than once…

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More to come

367162278

My eyes are drawn to people’s crotches whenever I get bored. I’ll just stop paying attention to what I’m looking at, and suddenly I’ll notice that I’m staring right at some girls crotch. Then I’ll look up and she’ll be gawking at me.

It’s kinda weird.

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360021994

One time while working at a resturaunt, a woman and her daughter came in. Her daughter was wearing a big coat with a hood and I couldn’t see her face. I grabbed a regular menu and a kid’s menu and sat them down. Then the daughter took off her coat and it was a full grown midget! She asked for a regular menu and I ran and got one, avoiding eye contact the rest of thier meal.

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364540251

im not big boned, im just fat. i hav man boobs, look: (.)(.)

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881815008

I’m getting fat. I know I could easily stop this by eating less junk food and working out more.

But i dont care anymore. There’s so many weak idiots around saying that its so hard to lose weight, and I’m using the morons to justify my sloth.

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486074304

I love all kinds of music — and I HATE people that judge others on the type of music they listen to. Like “you listen to emo? YOU’RE NOT METAL!” Eat shit and die.

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231540459

One time I stayed the night with my gay guy best friend at his mom’s house. We had gone out and got crazy drunk. I slept on her couch and peed all over it. The next morning, I put a pillow over it to hide it. I went to the kitchen to get some water and when I came back he was lying on the pillow!!

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528895741

It is my eighteenth birthday. I should be out partying with all my ‘friends’, but i stayed home tonight and watched re-runs of The Real World. I feel like I am missing out on a big part of life. When I get to college I am afraid I will fall into the same cycle and I am scared.

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601263853

I really hope he’s very rough and dominating tomorrow. I need to be dominated. I need to feel like I’m completely overpowered. Taken over. But only by him. Anyone else would piss me off.

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475537126

When I was 14 I played house with my sister she was 16. I was the dad…she was the mom…we wanted kids…then when we had sex and my mom came home…but she never found out about it and my sister got pregnant so we had to make up a lie.

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624610326

My friends only talk to me when they want something. When they got higher marks than me on their ICT coursework, all they did was brag constatly and i just wanted to smack them. I hate them.

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316575471

i have a fucking essay in tomorrow. havent even STARTED it.

french coursework. pah

physicis coursework. hahahaa.

all in. tomorrow. i might just skive with andy. he’s been looking sexy lately. smokes thou. erlack. oh well

hum.. colm smells so good. damnnation why cant he still be mine?

and why am i so fucking happy all of a sudden?! its fucking freaky shit. im scared and dont like it. i want to be sad again. i think. i dont know. hum

help.

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More to come. Check back tomorrow

545757737

I masturbated in an airplane bathroom coming home from Florida. When I got out of it there was a line of angry-looking people, I felt pretty good about myself.

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 170468433

my dad killed himself.

to anyone who romanticizes suicide:death is NOT pretty. you are gone forever. and you end up shitting yourself and then your family has to find you like that. it’s a really horrid image to leave your loved ones.

i hate my father for what he’s done to me and my family. for what he did to himself and what he took away from us.

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501882602

I can’t pee in public, I just freeze up.

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 212687660

Back when I was 12 I skipped a period one month and was paranoid thinking I was pregnant and carrying the next savior or something. I even had this elaborate scene in my head where no one would believe that I was a virgin and my parents would disown me. I can’t believe I was ever that stupid. I’m not even religious but I swear I was convinced I was carrying the child of God or Satan.

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565958817

I found a bunch of pictures of my mom, naked, in my dads dresser. I think her pussy is very pretty and she has great nipples… way to go mom!

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289719375

i sectretly pick my nose in bed and wipe it on my sisters pillow.

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676018743

when I was around 12 I stole my stepcousins favourit teddy bear and cut a hole in it and jizzed in it and stitched it back up because she had a tamagotchi and I didn’t, I could of just taken the tamagotchi but hers was pink

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175052750

Sometimes i get so horny that i wish someone would break into my house just so they could do me.

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More to come

441157241

Why do people try so hard to be perfect when it doesn’t really matter at all, we all die eventually?!I hate my life and that’s my excuse.

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978548009

iam crazy about this afghani girl .i asked her out but she said she is only allowed to date muslims guyz .i wish i was a muslim

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540320971

I fart in class and blame it on the korean kid next to me.-kevin-sorry hajoon!

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798300181

I wish I were black because being black is like having automatic cool points. when you’re white, in order to be cool, you have to be part of a group of people or represent a certain style whereas being black itself is its own style.

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584355557

Someone I know died. I got all the stuff he left behind because his family was too lazy to clean his place out. I think that its just great I got all the stuff, and all his friends want to know how I ended up with it all.Ha. Ha.

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More to come

831755737

my fantasy is to have sex with a pregnent woman and, at the same time, to get a blow job from the baby. Hot.
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925247161

when i’m alone i think that i am a super sayin from dragonball z. i once tried to fly away out of my bedroom window. i broke both my arms and ruptured my spleen
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578100483

once when I was 8, my third cousin, gave me a footjob while I was asleep. she thought I was asleep but I awoke. and waited for her to finsh me off. i came all over her pretty feet.. and now when I see her. I make slight signals and look at her feet. and she gets all red..

so I geuss that is why I am now in love with feet..
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892434446

I’m so jealous of what other people have that I form grudges against them.
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867742753

I love to rub chicken on my vagina and then smell it. I just love the smell. Afterwards I break down and cry though because I feel like such a creep. I’ll just smell it for like ten minutes and then collapse on the floor in tears. I feel so gross!
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532252472

i am a boy. and i desperately want to be a girl. sometimes i have to remind myself when im walking around that i am a boy. im trapped in the wrong body
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250053874

My roommate hates me!!! what am i to do now? I didn’t even do anything wrong…=(
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More to come

447362875

im 15. i havnt hit puberty. all my friends make fun of me for not having pubes. my penis is only 3 inches erect.i masterbate alot to goat porn. somthing about how they pee on their own face just arouses me in such a way i never thought possible.
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405779158

you know when you do a turd too big to fit down the toilet and it wont flush? and you know when you do a turd and it floats and wont flush? well i just did a turd that forfills both of those. the fucker is way to big to fit down the hole AND it’s floating. its gonna have to sit there and get soggy for a bit cause after 4 flushes it’s still there
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216984228

damn, today me and my girlfriend got walked in on 1st by her brother, and then an hour later by her mom.

i had to hide in the laundry room…
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139307540

I was just watching TV with my mom, while she was breastfeeding the baby.

I was looking at the baby, and then my mom flipped up her shirt not knowing that I was watching the baby, and I just saw her nipple.

I think I’m going to be scarred for life.
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378300447

I just killed a man and found out I can’t eat all of his corpse. what do I do?
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More to come. Check back tomorrow.

These confessions are all anonymous and may contain adult material.

156665713

Everything was so much more fun with you.

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 475080408

My girlfriend says I’m addicted to Texas Hold’em and sex. I wish I could find a way to combine both.

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886410389

when i was about 12, i got so desperate on how it would feel to makeout with someone that i gave tongue to my little cousin when i kissed him (he was about 6 months old). i cant get over the fact how gross and disgusting that is. i feel so stupid.

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759448722

what is the point of confessing on this site if we all remain anonymous? isn’t this just like spreading rumors because nobody knows who anybody else is? who are you confessing to when nobody knows who you are?

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 150894031

I chose to play Star Wars Galaxies over having a night out with my girlfriend. I have levelled up, you see.

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 262438776

i dance in my pajamas

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861547028

When I was 8 I lost my verginity to a plunger handle.

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894055774

my friend just got a nose job. she keeps asking me if I think it looks better. I want to tell her that, while she doesn’t look like as much of a bitch, she acts like an even bigger one.

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More to come