acollegestudent

My friend told me this story and I later found it online. Enjoy!

A young family moved into a house, next to a vacant lot.

One day, a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot.

The young family’s 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers.

Eventually the construction crew, all of them “gems-in-the-rough,” more or less, adopted her as a kind of project mascot.”

They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important.

At the end of the first week, they even presented her with a pay envelope containing ten dollars.

The little girl took this home to her mother who suggested that she take her ten dollars “pay” she’d received to the bank the next day to start a savings account.

When the girl and her mom got to the bank, the teller was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own pay check at such a young age.

The little girl proudly replied, “I worked last week with a real construction crew building the new house next door to us.”

“Oh my goodness gracious,” said the teller, and will you be working on the house again this week, too?”

The little girl replied, “I will, if those as*!#!es at Home Depot ever deliver the fu*#’ng sheet rock…

Haha I thought it was quite funny. I too as a child loved to observe construction workers but I was far too shy to ever approach them. I never really heard them say much either. Let alone curse like sailors :p

Well the other day I bought a video game package called The Orange Box. I bought it through Steam on my computer and it cost me $30. Well not me, my parent’s. They were nice enough to buy it for me. It includes Half Life 2, Half Life 2 - Episode 1, Half Life 2 - Episode 2, Half Life 2 - The Lost Coast, Peggle Extreme, Portal, and Team Fortress 2. I downloaded and installed them all and at first I ran into a little snag. I’m running Vista Business 64 bit and recently the 64 bit version of Half Life 2 hasn’t been working (waiting for a Valve update to fix this) so I’m running the 32 bit version of the game. Not a problem. Also Portal would crash every time I ran it so I had to disable the opening video (just the Valve logo and what not) before I was able to play it. Well I beat Portal today which was fairly simple but at the same time frustrating >_<

It was really fun though and a truly amazing game. The puzzles were tricky but I figured them out. Now I just have to beat 2 more advanced stages to get another achievement. Achievements are a cool thing that steam does that makes the games more fun. It’s a lot like xbox 360’s where you get achievements. I haven’t played Team Fortess 2 yet but my roommate really likes the game so I might give it a try. See if I can figure it out… :p

Well anyways I just beat Half Life which I bought for 98 cent’s when it was on sale on Steam which was quite a bargin. So now I’m woking on Half Life 2. Should be fun.

So here’s another story about one of my injures. By the way, I got the idea to tell you all about this from Katie. I was telling her about them and she told me that I should put them in my blog so I did. Funny thing is, I’ve been injured quite a bit and seriously too but I’ve never broken a bone. I’m glad too, I think I would hate a cast.

Anyways, we used to have redwood trees in our back yard but we cut them all down since the roots were destroying our foundation.  Anyways we had a lot of wood in our side yard and my dad decided to make a bench out of a log. So he sawed a rough bench out of it and nailed it to two stumps to make a bench. However nobody liked this bench because it gave you horrid splinters and it was in front of our rose busheds growing on terrices and they made it impossible to sit there without bleeding.

So me and my brother one day went into my dad’s tool box and took out his two hatchets. We then preceeded to chop up the bench. I’m not sure why we were doing it but it seemed like a good idea at the time.  Anyways my mom saw us from up on the deck and yelled at us to put the hatchets away before we got hurt. I thought this was a good idea so I turned to tell my brother that right as he was on his backswing. The blunt end of the hatchet caught me right above my left eye on my eyebrow and I started bleeding and crying. I was very young mind you. I think I got stitches or a butterfly bandage but whatever happened I don’t really have a scar.

My friend Carrie has a obsession with a show called Arrested Development. It’s about a guy who’s dad messed up his company and now he, Michal, has to take over and fix things up. Family comes first to him and so he moves the whole family into a model home since he doesn’t have a house. So far I’ve seen the first two seasons and find it quite amusing. Michael Cera is in it except he’s quite young and… fat. Well not fat but he’s chubby and that combined with a HORRIBLE wardrobe makes it funny in a sad sense. I normally don’t care what cloths people wear but the only thing he wears are short sleeved Hawaiian shirts with shorts or slacks. It’s pretty funny. Also he’s definitely into his cousin so I’m sensing some interesting incest plot twists coming up in the future seasons. Also Michael’s brother Job is a funny guy. He’s a magician that can’t seem to get a job anywhere and just makes a jackass out of himself all the time. Anyway watch it from the start and you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how catching it is. Cheers

My mom has one of those antique sewing machines that she used to use back in the day to sew stuff up. Anyways it has a lever on the bottom that you have to sway with your foot and it works the sewing machine. To get it started though you first spin a small wheel at the right side of the sewing machine. Well my brother liked to pull a stool up to the sewing machine and twist that handle back and forth pretending he was steering a ship and that he was a pirate. Well naturally when I saw I was interested so I went over to see what he was doing. Not realizing that by turning the wheel you made the needle go up and down I carelessly put my finger on the base of the sewing machine. My brother kept steering away and I slid my hand over the flat surface right as my brother made a sharp turn. In short the needle went down right as my index finger went under it causing it to stab all the way through my finger. I screamed and he turned the wheel again releasing my finger. I ran to the fridge screaming and grabbed a towel and wrapped it around my finger. It was soaked with blood. All I can remember after that was standing on that butcher paper on the doctor beads leaning on my dad’s shoulder while a nurse said “I’ll be right back.” She must have given me a sedative because after that I don’t remember anything. Anyways you can’t tell I was stabbed. :p

More to come.

One day me and my friend Zack were fishing oh his boat with his step dad John and his mom. We were waiting to catch something and weren’t having much luck so we decided to move to a different spot. We started to move, slowly at first, so I left my line in the water. We were moving at a decent speed and I was having fun watching my lure bob and wave in the water. Then I turned and started talking to Zack about god knows what. As I turned I unknowingly released the latch that kept the string from unraveling. Immediately my line started to unravel and before I knew it it was whizzing out of control. I didn’t know that the lure had gotten caught on the bottom of the lake. I immediately snapped the clasp back to stop the unraveling and at the time had a firm grip on the rod because I expected a tug. What I didn’t expect is to get pulled over the back of the boat turning as I did and my cheek getting cut open by the propeller. I just barely skimmed it but it cut my cheek from the bottom of my chin up my upper lip.

Well that’s the story of how I cut my face open. More gruesome stories to follow

So I wasn’t getting paid for my confessions posts since I took them from another site http://www.grouphug.us/ Feel free to visit their site if you want more confessions. However I’m going to switch topics now. I haven’t posted in a while and that is a combination of me being sick for a week and a half, I’m just starting to feel slightly better now, and me just being lazy. Also I got a new monitor for my desk. It’s a 22″ flat screen and all together with shipping (free) and a recycling fee, and all that jazz it was only $190. Oh yeah stupid tax was $12. Anyways I got it hooked up to my laptop and I’m using it to work on most of the time and it’s really handy when I got a lot going on. Although being sick all the time has not given me a chance to be really busy on my computer yet so we’ll have to see.

I think I’m going to get a lot of time to use it though because I need to build a website for my computer class and I’m going to be doing it all manually so working on a big screen is probably going to be easier on the eyes. I’ll let you know how it goes.

342364593

I hate being so melodramatic about my love life. I wish it would just figure itself so i wouldn’t have to worry about it all the time. But I guess that’s why i’m a hopeless romantic.

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560852192

most of my “a funny thing happened to me today” stories are total lies. although the ease with which i concoct them sometimes alarms me, i think it’s mostly a harmless little dumb habit that doesn’t get me into any trouble…

but…

… i think one of those stories, warped in the rumor mill, may have gotten one of my high-school teachers fired.

she was kind of a bitch.

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403176438

16/f

Last night I had a dream in which I was kissing this girl I know. The kissing was all rushed and desperate, and made me really hot. In real life, I don’t talk to the girl very much at all. But when I saw her today, all I could think about was kissing her.

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213960853

I really wish my best friend were more interested in me. He’d be a great boyfriend, but he’s just too good a friend to be like that.

He’s on the phone with another friend of ours. I look at him and wish soooooo much he’d kiss me.

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590441966

I don’t like how almost all the confessions on here have to do with hate or sex.
So…
My confession?
I really think paperclips are the cutest objects on Earth.

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694623160

A lot of chicks only like buff, built guys, but I find a lot of fat guys really cute, because fat guys are often strong as well. They’re like tough teddy bears. And a lot are really nice. Most buff guys are jerks.

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637608500

I’m the “nice-guy”

which means I won’t get ass ‘til I’m like 30 and married

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761505899

I pretended I had stomach problems to avoid having sex with my wife because I had jacked off 6 hours earlier…

I have done this more than once…

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More to come

367162278

My eyes are drawn to people’s crotches whenever I get bored. I’ll just stop paying attention to what I’m looking at, and suddenly I’ll notice that I’m staring right at some girls crotch. Then I’ll look up and she’ll be gawking at me.

It’s kinda weird.

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360021994

One time while working at a resturaunt, a woman and her daughter came in. Her daughter was wearing a big coat with a hood and I couldn’t see her face. I grabbed a regular menu and a kid’s menu and sat them down. Then the daughter took off her coat and it was a full grown midget! She asked for a regular menu and I ran and got one, avoiding eye contact the rest of thier meal.

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364540251

im not big boned, im just fat. i hav man boobs, look: (.)(.)

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881815008

I’m getting fat. I know I could easily stop this by eating less junk food and working out more.

But i dont care anymore. There’s so many weak idiots around saying that its so hard to lose weight, and I’m using the morons to justify my sloth.

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486074304

I love all kinds of music — and I HATE people that judge others on the type of music they listen to. Like “you listen to emo? YOU’RE NOT METAL!” Eat shit and die.

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231540459

One time I stayed the night with my gay guy best friend at his mom’s house. We had gone out and got crazy drunk. I slept on her couch and peed all over it. The next morning, I put a pillow over it to hide it. I went to the kitchen to get some water and when I came back he was lying on the pillow!!

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528895741

It is my eighteenth birthday. I should be out partying with all my ‘friends’, but i stayed home tonight and watched re-runs of The Real World. I feel like I am missing out on a big part of life. When I get to college I am afraid I will fall into the same cycle and I am scared.

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601263853

I really hope he’s very rough and dominating tomorrow. I need to be dominated. I need to feel like I’m completely overpowered. Taken over. But only by him. Anyone else would piss me off.

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475537126

When I was 14 I played house with my sister she was 16. I was the dad…she was the mom…we wanted kids…then when we had sex and my mom came home…but she never found out about it and my sister got pregnant so we had to make up a lie.

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624610326

My friends only talk to me when they want something. When they got higher marks than me on their ICT coursework, all they did was brag constatly and i just wanted to smack them. I hate them.

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316575471

i have a fucking essay in tomorrow. havent even STARTED it.

french coursework. pah

physicis coursework. hahahaa.

all in. tomorrow. i might just skive with andy. he’s been looking sexy lately. smokes thou. erlack. oh well

hum.. colm smells so good. damnnation why cant he still be mine?

and why am i so fucking happy all of a sudden?! its fucking freaky shit. im scared and dont like it. i want to be sad again. i think. i dont know. hum

help.

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More to come. Check back tomorrow

545757737

I masturbated in an airplane bathroom coming home from Florida. When I got out of it there was a line of angry-looking people, I felt pretty good about myself.

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 170468433

my dad killed himself.

to anyone who romanticizes suicide:death is NOT pretty. you are gone forever. and you end up shitting yourself and then your family has to find you like that. it’s a really horrid image to leave your loved ones.

i hate my father for what he’s done to me and my family. for what he did to himself and what he took away from us.

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501882602

I can’t pee in public, I just freeze up.

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 212687660

Back when I was 12 I skipped a period one month and was paranoid thinking I was pregnant and carrying the next savior or something. I even had this elaborate scene in my head where no one would believe that I was a virgin and my parents would disown me. I can’t believe I was ever that stupid. I’m not even religious but I swear I was convinced I was carrying the child of God or Satan.

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565958817

I found a bunch of pictures of my mom, naked, in my dads dresser. I think her pussy is very pretty and she has great nipples… way to go mom!

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289719375

i sectretly pick my nose in bed and wipe it on my sisters pillow.

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676018743

when I was around 12 I stole my stepcousins favourit teddy bear and cut a hole in it and jizzed in it and stitched it back up because she had a tamagotchi and I didn’t, I could of just taken the tamagotchi but hers was pink

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175052750

Sometimes i get so horny that i wish someone would break into my house just so they could do me.

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More to come